How to light a match

Hello.
A terrible idea.
By clicking on this blog, thou hast unleashed a virus which will destroy all the computers in the known univ-
Just kidding.

A good match

No, not about Manchester United versus Manchester City. Or about the Ashes Test Series. I'm talking about matches that you can light. You can't light a football or a grass field (Oh, you can? Gee, wasn't aware of that).
But you get what I mean.

Swedish matches are the best. Canadians are good too, and ITC's HomeLites aren't bad for a beginner. Just don't buy any local brand (if you're a beginner) or carve out a piece of wood into the shape of a match and add any chlorate or sulfur to it.

Step 1: Acquire a match

A matchbox would be good, too.

Step 2: Strike the match

Against the given area of the matchbox. Any other place will either not ignite it or it will make the match explode in your face, in some rare cases.

Step 3: Light something using it

Just don't light any electrical wire, dry grass, or petrol.
Don't tell me you don't know how to light something with it, or debemus ire ad domum tuam, et sensum aliquem pulsare in capite tuo.

Step 4: Congrats!

You have successfully lighted your first match!
Wave the match a few times or blow on it hard to get the flame packing, or you'll be the one packing for the hospital with a severe burn.

That's all for this blog. If you hate it, do consider giving it a heart! Follow me for regular notifications on my blogs. Thanks for reading (and wasting your precious time)!
Yours funnily,
Ayushman_C
(Photo courtesy of unsplash.com, met with the etiquette of lichess.org blog)